There is no obligation to bury the ashes of a person who has been cremated, as they are viewed as being similar to dust. However, if someone desires to bury the ashes, one needs to consult with a Rov to determine the appropriate course of action. Some people suggest burying the ashes in a non-traditional area, and if one wants to add them to the grave of someone who is being buried it's also a sheila. Before doing so, one must seek guidance from a Rov. If the ashes are from someone who was cremated against their wishes, it is important to consult with a Rov regarding the proper handling and burial of the ashes. Saying the Kaddish prayer for someone who has been cremated is not customary, unless a Rov grants permission on an individual basis. In order to ensure that a person receives a proper Jewish burial, it is acceptable to stretch the truth or use other means to facilitate the process.

Form for “My Burial Wishes ” stating they want a Jewish burial and authorizing a specific person to be in charge https://lastkindness.org/family-plan/

The best is to get a person to sign a legal document stating he or she wants to be buried, and designating a rabbi to have control over the funeral arrangements. Even if someone wrote in their will to cremate, no one will stop you from a burial, as long as no other immediate family objects. As it takes time for the will to be read ect. It is recommended to keep funeral and burial wishes in a separate document, as it is easier to change if needed. The agent designated under the decedent's power of attorney has the right to control the disposition of remains, even if they are not a family member. If there is no appointed agent, the closest living relative has the right to make decisions relating to the disposition of remains. If someone wrote in their will that they wish to be cremated, it is possible for immediate family members to object and request a burial, but it may require going to court and obtaining an injunction.

There is nothing prohibiting a person from including burial instructions in their Last Will and Testament. However, it is generally recommended that the instructions be in a separate document and discussed with loved ones (so they are aware of the individual’s wishes). This is because if their burial wishes were to change for some reason, it is much easier to change a separate document as opposed to a Last Will & Testament, which requires witnesses, self-proving affidavit and other legal requirements. More importantly, any probate proceeding (where a Last Will & Testament is effectuated by the Court, and authoritative letters are issued to the Executor so they can marshal the decedent’s assets and perform other estate work) occurs after the funeral has taken place. Thus, in the estate administration process, the Will is probated (which is where they establish its validity) after the decedent’s funeral/burial. Therefore, for the most flexibility and utility, it is better to keep funeral and burial wishes in a separate document.

Laws regarding dead bodies are not as straightforward as one might think. Many people falsely believe the decedent’s surviving spouse and immediate family are automatically entitled to control the disposition of remains, but it is actually the agent designated under the decedent’s power of attorney for health care (or Advanced Health Care Directive) who is allowed to direct the disposition of the decedent’s remains. This agent is the individual the decedent formally designated in their estate planning documents to make their health care decisions; it is irrelevant whether this person has a familial connection to the decedent. If the decedent had not appointed an agent to control the disposition of their remains, then the closest living relative (starting with the decedent’s surviving spouse) is empowered under the law to make decisions relating to the disposition of their remains. sets forth the order of priority – i.e., the charge first goes to the decedent’s spouse, if any, then to the decedent’s adult children, if any, then to the decedent’s parents, if still alive, and then continues down the enumerated line of succession.

If the funeral home insists on cremation, one can threaten legal action and even take them to court if necessary. Funeral homes usually prefer to avoid legal issues and may eventually give in if the matter is drawn out. If a family member is determined to fight for a burial, it is best to obtain an injunction through a lawyer, although it is possible to file one without legal representation. In cases where siblings are in dispute, each has equal rights, and if the matter goes to court, a judge will make the final decision